How many times in our lifetimes do we go through this cycle? How many times do we struggle to understand what life is all about, and in particular, what my life is all about?
None of us escapes this search for meaning, for understanding: whether we are at a moment of suffering, of feeling overburdened or whether we are measuring our worth or fulfilling our goals. In which of these cycles do we find ourselves at this moment? Does reading the Scriptures, fulfilling our obligations, or seeing the good in those around us give us insight, direction, hope?
When and how often do we reflect upon our life and its meaning? Do we invite God into this time of reflection? Do we seek His guidance, His continuous presence as we struggle to find the direction we need to pursue? This prayer of Thomas Merton may be helpful:
My Lord God, I have no Idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that
I think I am following Your will does not
mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please
You does, in fact, please You.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this, You will lead me
by the right road though I know nothing about it.
Therefore will I trust You always though I may
seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for You are ever with me,
and You will never leave me to face my peril alone.
“Thoughts in Solitude”
Sister Kathleen Sullivan, O.P.